There went $10...

...but I guess you get what you pay for. Counselling was a wash. An awful lot of "duh" was involved, along with "no I don't want to kill myself" and "no I don't have a childhood trauma, thanks." There was also the ever so helpful "well, these symptoms do sound like depression....but they also sound like stress, shock, grief, and general holiday blahs." Um, thanks.

So she told me to write a lot about my feelings (at least an hour a day to deal with it all!....that's a lot of writing about me feeling bummed and whiny isn't it!) and then to rate every day on a scale of 1-bad to 10-awesome and figure out what made it good or bad.

Ergh. I took off from work early to sulk. Never underestimate the healing power of watching tv in your jammies with coccoa.

Day thus far: five, for sheer mediocrity.

Cattiness

Ursula K. Le Guin, in shock over SciFi's adaptation of Earthsea has written an amazingingly catty and scathing review called Earthsea in Clorox. Yee-ow!

I am dwelling on my thinking hour of sucky things. Ergh. It's what the therapist-type person said to do, but quite honestly it seems like all I do is dwell on it anyway, which is why I'm trying to avoid it by, y'know, doing positive things like hanging out with friends and doing the Holiday Elfishness and all, and listening to All American Rejects because their music is all about pain and getting pissed and over it.

Raar!!

Day rating

Good:

*Turned in timesheet at work, so I can get paycheck. Always a good thing.
*Leaving early, making coccoa, and watching Colin Firth version of Pride and Prejudice and having a bit of a nap.
*NOT emailing Andrew despite reading newsbits I know he'd be way into, like an interview with the Hernandez Bros and stuff. See, I don't need him.
*Making appointment for January for different, hopefully much better, therapist type person.
*Getting psyched for fun weekend and cool parties!!! :)

Bad:

*Spending $10 on therapist who doesn't seem that helpful. Yes I am cheap, particularly given seasonal requirements.
*General downness relating to required dwelling on (alas, not Lemony Snicket-related) the series of unfortunate events.
*Being unable to email Andrew; however, see above.

So I'm going to keep the day at 5, but looking forward to a weekend of 10s! WOO!