caitri | Help is a Good Thing

Well I made a big decision last night/this morning. I need help, and that is okay.

I haven't felt really well in a long, long time. I should maybe have tried something last year when this all started but I guess I was too in shock or something. Well I am going to start changing things to be better.

So I took today off. I did my best to actually relax and not think about all the things that have been bugging me about my life. On Wednsday I am going to the family doctor and see about getting some meds for sleep, anti-anxiety and/or anti-depression. I am going to stop telling everyone I am fine and can take care of myself when I'm not.

I'm going to learn how to ask for help when I need it. I am going to learn how not to put energy into things that don't work and can't change. I am going to figure out what the hell makes my life better and how to get them.

Good start, yeah?

Only a couple of people know about this (the usual suspects). I am debating whether to tell more people, to see if I can form some kind of protection to keep me on the straight and narrow.

Here's the first day of the rest of my life...