caitri | Fic: Totally Not a Stockholm Syndrome Thing, PG, Kirk/McCoy

Title: Totally Not a Stockholm Syndrome Thing
Author: caitri
Pairings: Kirk/McCoy, Spock/Uhura
Rating: PG
Word Count: 851
Summary: Leonard did not need this on top of everything else. A BTVS/Trek XI mash-up.
Disclaimer: I know this may come as a shock, but I am not, amazing as it may seem, Gene Roddenberry, J.J. Abrams, Paramount or Bad Robot. Nor Joss Whedon or Mutant Enemy. Just so you know.

“You worry too much, man,” Jim says. His eyes flick up, past him, and for a half-second he starts before relaxing back into his familiar, smug confidence. “’Sides, the cavalry is coming. Don’t worry,” he adds, blue eyes turning gold as his game-face appears, fangs extending, “I’ll make a distraction. See ya, Bones.”

Leonard starts to tell him not to call him that for the eleven millionth time since Nero’s coven had brought him here, but the vampire is already gracefully leaping down from his cage.

“Hey, guys! Who wants to play a game?” Jim asks, pushing the fledglings around as he is wont to do. He hits each of them on the head in a mockery of playfulness. “It goes like this. ‘Duck! Duck! Dead!” He snaps the neck of the last one and the vampire bursts into dust.

Leonard should be horrified at the casualness with which he watches Jim kill, but really, he’s too focused on his friends coming to his rescue as they move quietly in the dim light of the factory.

“Leonard!” Nyota’s voice is fraught with worry as she takes in the bruises and cuts on him. “Are you—“

“Scrapes,” he says gruffly. “It’s nothing. Look, we need to get out of here—“

“Gaila and Spock have our backs, don’t worry.” The Slayer’s grin is damn near feral. “Any second now—there!”

An explosion rocks the building.

“Whoo! Time to par-tay!” Jim sounds gleeful, but Leonard doesn’t dare look in his direction.

Nyota breaks the locks to his cage with ease. She shrugs at his expression—he had tried picking them, wearing them down, and of course they hadn’t given during his whole imprisonment. “Super strength. Sucks for school lockers, epic for getaways! C’mon!” She puts an arm around him, using the rope around her shoulder to rappel them down to the ground with ease. Any other time he’d be terrified of the height but, well, his life is being saved, so he’s over it.

Another loud boom, and the old building quakes around them again. “What is that?” Leonard asks.

Nyota looks sheepish. “Pavel and Scotty made it,” she answers. “I didn’t ask. And don’t tell Pike. He kinda doesn’t know.”

“Right. Keep the Watcher out of it. Got it.” Leonard’s not—he’s just not going to think about it. At all. He looks over as another vampire is dusted mere feet away.

“I got one!” Gaila says delightedly, appearing abruptly with a crossbow. She turns to Spock. “Did you see that? I got one!”

“I am most thrilled for you,” Spock says dryly, but it’s clear all his attention is for Nyota.
“Are you—“

“We’re fine,” she says hurriedly, meeting his glance and then looking away.

Yeah, nothing going on there. Idiots. Leonard snorts to himself.

“C’mon, let’s get out of here, before—“ Nyota breaks off, because that’s when the Master appears.

“Slayer!” Nero’s voice rings out. He regards the havoc before him with astonishing equanimity, half his coven dead, his nest falling to his ears around him. “You dare?!”

“It’s a hobby,” Nyota chirps back. She adopts a casual stance, one Leonard has seen all too often when she’s arguing with the other cheerleaders at school. “What can I say? I got bored of shopping.”

“Insolent—“ Nero breaks off, looking down in shock. A stake sticks out of his chest. The vampire looks dumbstruck, and infuriated. “This isn’t how it goes!” And then he’s dust.

“Blah, blah, blah,” Jim says. He smirks, and takes in the rag-tag band of the Slayer and her friends. “All talk, no play. I hate dudes like him. Don’t you?”

“You!” Nyota’s voice drips with venom as she drops into fighting stance. “We’re going to finish this.”

“Guys, we’ve got to get out of here!” Hikaru appears, Pavel and Scotty following, all of them with faces covered in soot. “Like, pronto!”

“We will,” Jim promises Nyota. His eyes shift to Leonard just for a second, and he feels himself grow cold, then hot at the memory of their fevered kiss earlier. Then Jim’s gaze is completely on the Slayer. “But not tonight. We’ll dance some other time, ‘kay?” And then with supernatural speed he vaults upwards and out of the window.

“I’m going to kill him so bad,” Nyota mutters, but then their friends are pulling them away, and into the night.

Soon enough they are back at the library, and Pike looks stern, the Watcher infuriated that they didn’t call him. Spock and Nyota avoid each other studiously, Pavel sits at his computer to do research while Hikaru looks over his shoulder anxiously, and Gaila and Scotty flirt quietly in the stacks.

No one asks Leonard why he’s not more roughed up than he is, and he doesn’t know how to tell them about Jim Kirk chasing fledglings away from him or bringing him non-gross food and band-aids. Doesn’t know how to tell them he owes the charismatic vampire.

Doesn’t know how to tell his friends, his Slayer, that he’s kinda maybe, for the first time in his life, in love.